Letter of the Language Law

I will have to admit that entering a public college after having been homeschooled my entire life and been almost exclusively in Christian circles was quite a shock to me on many levels. I could talk about the differences and challenges all day, but there is one aspect in particular that I want to address.

You see, while movies containing a lot of what is classified as "inappropriate language" are rated R, nobody rated or censored the guys chatting before calculus. No "convenient" sound effect goes off when one of my classmates uses vulgarity. There are no asterisks to bleep out real life.

So that made me think...what really constitutes bad language? What makes one word okay to use and another, with perhaps just one or two different letters, so much worse? And then there are words that were once used in everyday conversation and now have an entirely worse meaning. And of course, there are people who misuse God's name all the time, without even thinking about it.

 

And that isn't even getting into euphemistic language, which is basically changing a couple letters so that it's technically a different word and then using it for the exact same purpose.

We are all pretty familiar with the third commandment (Exodus 20:7 ESV)

You shall not take the name of the Lord your God in vain, for the Lord will not hold him guiltless who takes his name in vain.

Basically: don't say God's name unless you are actually talking about or to God. Pretty simple.

Right?

Well, there are several euphemistic ways of saying God's name. Are those okay, since they don't consist of the exact same letters and sounds? What about some of the others? What about the replacements (maybe instead of the "g" in "OMG" standing for "God", letting it stand for "guacamole" or something)? What if, instead of using **** to insult someone, I just call them more socially acceptable words? And wait, aren't there hand signals that say some of the same things, except without letters and sounds?

If your head isn't spinning, maybe it's because you've already been thinking about this. I've been going back and forth on it for a while: on one hand, maybe we should just restrict all of our language to what would be allowed in a G-rated movie; on the other, maybe it's just all sounds and as long as whoever we're around doesn't care, we can use it.

Is there an answer?

I wasn't sure for a while. But the other day, this verse showed up on one of my daily Bible verse apps (as a side note, daily Bible verse apps are great and usually free).

Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. (Ephesians 4:29 NIV)

 It was one of those times where I had a bunch of questions that I didn't know how to ask and then God gave me the answer key and it all clicked. (Understanding it, as opposed to implementing it, is easy though...but we'll get to that later.)

Let's break it down. "Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths..." (The ESV says "corrupting talk", but I think that "unwholesome" gets the point a little closer to home.) If we stop here, it's easy to go about our day trying not to use words on some arbitrary list. "I'm not using unwholesome talk!" you could argue.

But let me ask this: Let's say that "a*b*c" is a "bad word" to say that someone is brainless, ignorant, unintelligent, etc. The word a*b*c is never heard in G and PG rated movies and is hinted at in PG-13. You are walking down the sidewalk and someone is on their phone and bumps into you, knocking your drink all over your printed presentation and your outfit. You could call them a*b*c and a couple people around you will cringe. Or you could loudly berate the person, calling them ignorant, brainless, and unintelligent, maybe even throwing in a "censored" version of the word, like x*y*z.

Here's the question: No matter what word you use, will the effect on the clumsy person be essentially the same? Won't he stand up from the accident feeling just as terrible, angry, and ignorant in both scenarios?

The point is that it is less about the word than the meaning. Words have to have meaning or a society doesn't work. (I already covered this some in The Solid Word) If you want to convey a message that someone is ignorant, overweight, or displeasing in some way, you can do that in many ways that would not get censored out for a PG-13 audience. So it's less about "can you?" and more about "should you?"

Before I wrap up, let's cover the rest of the verse. "...but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen."

As with most commandments God gives us there is a negative element (Don't say bad things) and a positive element (instead, build others up with your words). And, as usual, it is way harder to obey the positive facet than just the negative.

I mean, I could go a while without tearing someone down verbally, and maybe even keep my thoughts from insulting them silently. But for every word that comes out of my mouth (or my fingers) to be helpful and beneficial...every word...is that even possible?

Only with a lot, and I mean a LOT, of prayer. And the Holy Spirit. And even then, it still won't be perfect until Heaven.

But don't get discouraged. You can start where you are. Maybe make it a point to say one encouraging thing every day, or to stop yourself when you are tempted to speak poorly to or of another person. It doesn't have to change in a day. Just don't stay where you are.

Prayer Life in War Room

How's your prayer life? Would you say it is hot? Cold? Somewhere in between?

I imagine that most of us would admit that it isn't as hot as it could be but that it's not nonexistent. Some of us might confess that prayer time comes primarily right before eating and maybe during a bad headache or preceding a test we may not have studied well for.

Last weekend I had the privilege to see the new movie War Room and I was impressed by the power of prayer depicted in the movie. This is not a movie review, although I highly recommend that you watch it at some point, even if you wait until Netflix has it. Don't worry, I won't spoil anything. But I wanted to talk about prayer.

In the movie, the main character is asked whether her prayer life is hot or cold. She replies that it's somewhere in the middle. She is then served a cup of lukewarm coffee to prove the point that it is better to be hot or to be cold.

We often tell ourselves that we are better than being lukewarm, but I think we get comfortable in our salvation and think, "I'll pray tomorrow. Today's going pretty well. I don't really need anything."

First of all, prayer is not for when we need something. It is to be an ongoing conversation with God.

Second, you will always need prayer. Whether you are fighting temptation or struggling through a storm or simply trying to do God's will, you will never find a time in which prayer is not appropriate.

Another point I drew from the movie was that, when you're praying for someone, it's really hard to see them as the enemy. The focus is turned from your fellow creation to the Enemy of our souls. When you take the battle to the right enemy, chances of victory will increase.

Prayer also allows us to turn our problems over to God; in return, we receive peace.

Maybe the biggest thing I walked away with was the realization that, although the movie inspired me to clean out my closet and make myself a "war room", I was going to go home, go to bed, get up, do life, and go back to bed, all without even saying "Hi" to God. And to be honest, I have live up to my expectation.

But I want that to change. I want to learn to fight in prayer, to be a prayer warrior. But to do that I'm going to need divine help.

I hope that your prayer life is vibrant, but if you feel like it's lacking, I encourage you to see War Room. I know: there are plenty of "cheesy Christian" scenes (but what is a Christian movie without some bad acting?). But I think it is worth the watch.

Let's get our prayer life heated back up...starting by actually praying.

The Good, the Bad, and the Busy

With the school year begun in earnest, I have discovered just how little time I have. I spend a good portion of every day at my university, come home, finish homework, and try to eat and sleep between social and church activities. It seems like every day someone has hatched a plan to study together or go out to eat or go mini-golfing or have a movie night. And let's face it, those are the things that get me through a week of calculus: I look forward to them and have a reward for surviving another few days.

On top of school and social events and church functions, I have things to do around the house, need to get some exercise in, and especially have quiet time. Unfortunately, by the time I am home and have checked social media thoroughly and pretended to do homework while on YouTube (admit it, you've done it too), I don't have much time for God.

Oops.

But honestly, it isn't really because I don't have much time after everything else...it's because I don't make much time before everything else.

I know I've talked about this before (Idolatry of Origami) but it's so important that I want to talk about it again.

And before I get into it, I just want to say that I am not pointing fingers or preaching at you. I am reprimanding myself for the time I spend on social media and with friends and even at church.

"Even at church"? Yes. I think that being at church and serving there is a great thing, certainly something God wants us to have. But I think that a lot of people (unconsciously) think that, if they go to church and serve God and worship with the Body, they will have gotten all their "God-time" for the week. I love church and volunteer/mission work, but if that is all I do...well, I've missed the point.

Imagine that you have a friend and you spend a lot of time at their house, looking at scrapbooks and baking their favorite meals and cleaning their house and doing favors for those they love. Imagine further that, although you do a lot of great things for them, you never actually sit down and get to know them. You could tell another friend all about them and how to be friends with them. But you don't actually know them.

God doesn't disapprove of our going to church or of our service to Him. Those are good and even necessary things to grow in your Christian walk. But God said,

To love [God] with all your heart, with all your understanding and with all your strength, and to love your neighbor as yourself is more important than all burnt offerings and sacrifices. (Mark 12.33 NIV)

Of course, we don't actually set cows on fire and offer them to God on an altar, but we give of our precious time and resources when we attend and serve at church. And I'm not saying that God doesn't appreciate those things. But He calls us to love Him and love one another, and that is more important than anything. Everything.

So if loving God and others is our highest calling, why are we spending so much time on Instagram and Netflix? I sometimes think that the many blessings we have in a developed nation like America are really more of a distraction than a blessing, when it comes down to it. They keep us busy. I heard a quote (and it has been attributed to several different people so I'm not sure who actually said it) that sums this up:

"If Satan can't make you bad, he'll make you busy."

I read C.S. Lewis's The Screwtape Letters and it was so eye-opening, because one of the tactics that Uncle Screwtape advises his nephew Wormwood to use to keep his subject from gaining salvation was to distract him, to keep him too busy to consider what he had learned.

None of the things that we do during the day that keep us busy are inherently sinful. (I say this generally...obviously if you do spend your time in an activity that is inherently sinful, then you will need to work that out with God. I am talking about social media, socializing, and general busyness.) But they become sinful when we allow them to intrude on our time with God. For example, if reading this blog distracts you from your devotional time, then you can stop reading it. I would much rather you hear God's words than mine.

Again, this is just as much to myself (if not more) as it is to you. Frankly, the first thing I do when I wake up is not to have a moment with God. I usually check Instagram. And blogging about it makes it feel so wrong, and I want to resolve to stop. But I know that, when I wake up tomorrow morning, more likely than not, I will be halfway down my feed before I realize that I am going to be late for school, and I will be halfway to school before I remember that I haven't had much water to drink this morning, and I will be halfway through my day before it hits me that I haven't given God a moment's thought.

And He deserves so much more. I mean, He deserves more than I could ever possibly give, even if I dedicated my entire life to worshipping Him. But He deserves more than a table blessing and a half-absent prayer request.

So let's give Him the time and the praise and the love He deserves.